Ed Note: For the next week -- and possibly longer if the readers don't run him out of town -- Noah Becker, a senior History major from Wayne, Pa., will be providing some guest blog posts. So without further ado, here is his first one, a look at whether or not a Penn-Cornell basketball rivalry exists.
This post is adorable and flattering. But c’mon Cornell, you already have a sports rival, a real sports rival with a full Wikipedia entry (where else do you think I get my knowledge?). This rival has both an awesomely smelly tradition and full scale administration crackdowns for rowdy fan behavior. In fact, it meets most of the standards that classify a Level Three Hatfield-McCoy Rivalry. Not all of these levels must be met in order to qualify as a mere Level One Friendly Rival, nor do they have to be met in any specific order. But, unfortunately for the Hill People of New York, Penn-Cornell meets none of them.
1. Sustained equality of ability
This criterion is met only in the sense that both Penn and Cornell have been playing basketball against each other and thus both teams had the theoretical ability to play said sport. Otherwise, Penn thoroughly dominates the series. Since a 74-56 Quakers win on Feb. 7, 1969 -- which I use since Saturday's Cornell at Penn game will mark the 40th anniversary of what I'm sure was a rousing match -- Penn is 66-13 against the Big Red. Amazingly, if Cornell won every single game for the next 20 years -- and of course, in a future that dystopian, 2+2 would equal 5 and freshman writing seminars would be taught in Newspeak -- on Feb. 7, 2029, the Quakers would still have a double digit advantage in wins in the series in the last 60 years.
2. Proximity or Class Warfare
Location (Louisville v. Kentucky, Arizona v. Arizona State, Kansas v. Missouri) or a disparity regarding the schools’ relative controls of the means of production—i.e. the “Haves” against the “Have-Nots”—(Harvard v. Cornell in hockey, Little Cowboys v. Little Giants, Notre Dame v. Anyone) play major roles in fostering intense rivalries. In fact, the best rivalries contain elements of both (Duke v. UNC, Villanova v. St. Joe’s, Pre-2004 Yankees v. Pre-2004 Red Sox).
As anyone who’s ever traveled to Ithaca can tell you, it’s not close and a characterization of Penn as an old, Ivory Tower institution rings false. Sure, historically Penn’s picked on the other Ivy League basketball teams, and it was founded before Cornell, but when constructing the evil, plutocratic, Ivy League-educated, blue-blooded villain for literature or film, the elite status conferred by Harvard, Yale or Princeton makes for a more convincing snob.
3. Undeniable, uncontrollable mutual feelings of loathing
Fans of both teams in the rivalry must believe their rival to have a truly despicable, untenable aspect that causes a deep antipathy. The modern king of this is Bill Belichick whose rivalry with the NFL -- by this I mean the league and everyone who populates it -- drove him to a sort of Shakespearean madness which included running up the score on poor, defenseless coaching legend Joe Gibbs. This category while intentionally ambiguous is generally populated by the nationally disdained (Duke Basketball, Notre Dame Football, Dallas Cowboys, New York Yankees).
Meanwhile, what is there to loathe about Cornell? Steve Donahue is a former Penn assistant coach, their best players, Louis Dale, Jeff Footer and Ryan Wittman, seem generally unobjectionable and many of the best jokes in The Office revolve around the Big Red.
So what is their relationship to Penn if not a rival? It seems more like the relationship between a younger brother and his older, cooler sibling with Cornell getting picked on, trying to emulate Penn -- by hiring Donahue, and desperately trying to measure up to Penn by telling them about the “rivalry” between them. It’s cute and flattering that Cornell wants a rivalry, but it’s just not true.
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February 5th, 2009 at 3:53 pm
After 10 days of Andrew Scurria's picture on the regrettable Remy Cofield exit interview, we get I'm not sure what from Noah Becker. It wasn't worth the wait, and for those of us fans of Penn's sports, and in this case interested in some meaningful insight as to what's really going on in Men's BB, I've become just as concerned about DP reporting or lack.
Here's another perspective on the Cornell rivalry: A couple of weeks ago, I fortuitously was seated next to Coach Steve Donahue's wonderfully supportive extended family, that came from Philadelphia and Long Island for the Columbia game. And on the court the evidence was in plain sight that Cornell will be a power for the foreseeable future. Remember, Coach Donahue was Fran Dunphy's primary recruiter.
Full disclosure, I wasn't Coach Dunphy's greatest fan, and when his departure was announced, I hoped Penn would recruit Brown's Glen Miller, even before he announced interest in the job. I was impressed by how he got maximum results from invariably less talented but always hard fighting teams. I remain a Glen Miller fan, but would really appreciate some insight from DP reporters as to what's going on. For example:
* Two great recruiting classes and certifiable talent, so why the under performance this year?
* Steve Danley's endorsement of Coach Miller and this team, so why their lack of fire and departures? It doesn't add up.
How about some value added reporting, DP Staff? You are better than the recent offerings.
February 5th, 2009 at 5:26 pm
Ernie, I’m thrilled to have befuddled and underwhelmed you.
As to your questions:
My guess is that the team is "under performing" for two reasons: 1. They’ve been hurt, 2. They’re young. 2/5 of the presumed pre-season starting line-up was lost for the season before January (Schreiber and Smith) and only 1/5 of the current starters is an upperclassman (Votel). Though the freshman and sophomores are very skilled, it would be foolish to think that they’ve reached their respective peaks. The final couple of possessions of the Dartmouth game were harried and as those guys age, many of the mistakes they’re making now and made on Saturday will correct themselves.
I don’t know where you perceive a lack of fire as the team looked wildly excited after the Harvard game and every time they went to the huddle in the second half of the Dartmouth game. The departures seem to be numbers related, as in, there are only so many minutes in a game and divvying them up sometimes leave guys out in the cold.
February 6th, 2009 at 10:37 am
Thanks, Noah, your response and feedback were much more whelming.
February 6th, 2009 at 3:35 pm
I agree its not a rivalry, yet, but I don't think the all-time record is particularly relevant. If Cornell and Penn are 1-2 in the Ivy League consistently over the next 10 years or so, it will have become a rivalry, even though Penn will still have a commanding lead in the overall series.
Cornell definitely needs to win a few more titles before it can be a rivalry, however.